Joe Exclamation
It may have been decades since your last spring break trip, but those wild memories stay with you for a lifetime. In case you needed a reminder we dug up a few hilarious spring break stories that are sure to make you LOL.
1. “While on Spring Break in Mexico, a Bunch of My Friends and I Went Swimming With the Dolphins. You Hung Onto the Dolphin’s Fin As It Dragged You Around the Pool and Everyone Watched. I Was Having a Great Time Until My Board Shorts Slipped Off and I Continued to Hang on for the Remainder of the Lap Silently Wishing I Had Worn Underwear.”
2. “I Decided to Sign up for Surf Lessons After Seeing How Hot the Instructor Was. We Started on the Sand, but I Told Her How Athletic I Was—and Said I’d Be Fine If We Moved Things Along a Little Faster…Which Was a Really Bad Idea. She eventually Got Sick of Watching Me Get Battered by the Waves and Suggested We Take the Lesson Back to Land. As We Were Walking Out of the Ocean, I Lifted the Surf Board Over My Head to Try to Look Cool, but I Lost My Balance and Practically Knocked Her Out With It.”
3. “My Friend and I Were in Miami and We Went to This Posh Lounge for the Night. We Were Talking to These Two Really Hot Guys When a Gust of Wind Came and Blew up My Skirt. It Wouldn’t Have Been a Big Deal, but I Was Wearing Spanx Underneath My Dress, that Went All the Way Down to My Thighs. One of the Guys Immediately Commented on My ‘Enormous Granny Panties.’
4. “I Booked a Spring Break Trip to Panama City Beach With My Friends and Used up Every Penny I Had to Get Down There. Once I Was There, Realized I Had About $10 Left for Food for the Entire Seven Days. I Went to Walmart and Bought a 90-pack of Totino’s Pizza Rolls for $7 and an Extra-large Water, and Rationed Them Out. That’s All I Ate for the Entire Time I Was There. I Can’t Even Look at Them Now.”
5. “Matthew Was Looking Forward to Spending His Spring Break Relaxing With His Best Friend Jason in the Warm Weather at His Grandparents’ Beautiful Ranch. His Grandparents Woke up and Went to Bed Early so They Never Really Got in His Way. However, One Night, Jason and Matthew Decided It Would Be Really Relaxing to Go in the Hot Tub in the Middle of the Night Before They Went to Bed. When They Discovered Matthew’s Grandparents Naked in there Together. The Rest of the Week Was Pretty Tense.”
6. “I Didn’t Know I Wasn’t Supposed to Mix Red Wine and Tequila. I Got Way Too Drunk Way Too Early in the Evening and Ran Into a Girl I Knew From Another High School That I Hadn’t Seen in Years. She’d Had a Nose Job and Looked so Radically Different That I Puked All Over Her. My Drunken Brain Couldn’t Handle the Shock of Her New Face.”
7. “My Friend and I Drove to West Florida to Meet Another Friend. We Went to a Bar, and Then Were Looking for an After Party. Some Rando Invited Us to ‘his House’ where the Dog Went to the Bathroom on the Carpet, and No One Seemed to Care. Then, We Noticed That the Guy Who Invited Us Wasn’t in Any of the Photos in the Living Room. In the End, We Got Naked and Went Swimming at This Sketchy Guys House, Because It Was Still Spring Break.”
8. “I Trekked Over to a Random Tattoo Shop, and The Tattoo Artist Was Drinking and Smoked a Huge J**nt Halfway Through. I Should Have Left Right Then, but I Didn’t, and Somehow Ended up With two totally unsymmetrical Red Heineken Stars on Each Ankle.
9. “I Was in Panama and Got so Sick I Passed Out and Fell Into the Toilet I Had Just Peed In. I Then Ate a Raw Cashew Nut After Our Tour Guide Said It Was Okay. Incidentally, It’s Not Okay. I Broke Out With a Poison Ivy-like Rash Over My Entire Body Because Raw Cashews Have the Same Chemical As Poison Ivy.”
10. “My Junior Year of High School, I Went to Mexico for a Week With My Best Friend and Her Family. It Was Our Last Night of Vacation, When I Met Steven. I Hinted to My Friend That I Wanted Alone Time With Steven, so the Group Went Ahead of Us. We Sat Down Behind a Stack of Chairs and Started Hooking Up. “Suddenly, It Became Very Bright. I Thought My Friends Were Pulling a Prank, but When I Looked up, There Were Security Guards Shining Their Flashlights on Us.
What has happened to you on Spring Break?
Comment Below!